Saturday, June 21, 2008

Dennis Rainey shares the impact of his granddaughters death and the hope that provides hope

Thursday night, June 19, little 7 day old Molly Ann Mutz, daughter of Rebecca (Rainey) and Jake Mutz went to be with her Creator.  Thursday morning, I sent an email out to share her moving story with you through the eyes of FamilyLife's President and, more importantly, Molly's grandpa, Dennis Rainey.  If you had a chance to read that heart wrenching story, I thought you might want to read Dennis' follow up journal entry to us this morning as he reflected on Molly's short life, the power of God to move in the midst of the pain and that without a relationship with Christ, something like this would be impossible to accept or handle.  So, here's Dennis' reflection. 
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Reflections of a Grandpa on the loss of his granddaughter
 
On Thursday, Miss Molly made her way to her new home in heaven around 6:15 PM.  Her last day with us began with a pretty average sunrise, but the sunset that closed out her Coronation Day was spectacular.  
 
As we left the hospital, thunderstorms had blown up over the mountains resulting in a dazzling sunset splashing platinum gold shafts of light all over the  Rockies.  The light behind the clouds was brilliant.    It was as though the sun was declaring, Magnificent Molly is home!   What a homecoming it must have been-saying good bye and letting her leave this earthly home was one tough assignment for a young mother and father and a couple of families that had become hopelessly attached to this fragile little girl. 
 
The Scriptures declare, "This is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it."  That verse challenged our faith all day long, but it was nonetheless a day ordered by God's sovereign hand of love and mercy.
 
Jake and Rebecca spent nearly all morning with Molly.  As we arrived, Beth, Molly's nurse and an angel herself, told us that Molly's vital signs were slipping.  Her little heart was racing at over 170 beats per minute and she was receiving 100 per cent pure oxygen, yet, her oxygen saturation level in her blood stream was down to 80.  She was losing color.  The nurse told us that it was Molly's way of telling her parents, "it's time for me to leave you and go home to heaven."  I am weeping as I write these words, none of us wanted Molly to leave.
 
Around noon, Rebecca and Jake honored all of us as grandparents by giving us the honor and privilege of holding Molly and gave us a moment to say good bye.  None of us expected we'd get that treat.  We didn't want to rob them of one moment with their precious daughter.
 
Barbara got to be first.  It was quite a maneuver to make sure all the wires and tubes that were supporting Molly's life didn't get tangled, but finally there she was in her arms, Mimi's granddaughter.  Barbara kept saying how much of an honor it was to hold this little princess of the King.  She held her close and cooed words of love and admiration over her beautiful face.   Smiles and tears mingled.
 
Jake's parents soaked all of her they could in and when it was Bill's turn, he stroked her face, tenderly whispered his love for her and  shared his favorite Scriptures with her.  Pam beamed as she gently rocked Molly and sang "Jesus Loves Me" to her.  Both Bill and Pam just held her, kissing her face, holding her little hands and weeping as they said good bye.
 
As Molly was placed in my arms she felt so warm, just like every other newborn.  I tried to sing to her and I doubt that she recognized "Jesus Loves Me" as I choked out the words through tears.  
 
Jake who was video-taping, asked me, "Papa, why don't you tell Molly a story, one of your 'Speck People' stories?"  I have to tell you that 'speck stories' are adventure stories of tiny little people and equally tiny little creatures who live in a make believe microscopic world, facing any number of challenges that demand courage and faith.   Our kids were enthralled with these tiny people stories and now I am telling them to my grandkids.  The stories always take the Speck People to the very edge of danger---and then I close, by saying, "And you'll have to wait until tomorrow night to hear the rest of the story."  My grandkids love these 'continue' stories.  (honestly, I'm not all that good at it---I just make it all up as I go.)
 
So here's Jake asking me to tell a story---and I respond to Jake, "You aren't going to ask me to do that, after I've just blubbered my way through a simple song like "Jesus Loves Me", are you?"    Jake was joined by Rebecca in saying a resounding yes-they wouldn't let me off the hook.
 
So Rebecca and Barbara surround me as I held little Molly, looked into her face and began my story.  A Speck grandfather and his Speck granddaughter went fishing for tiny speck fish.  My story was less than 60 seconds long and I looked up into Rebecca's face and she had the biggest grin, dimples and all.  She was loving the moment.  As I concluded my story, I told Molly, "the Speck grandfather and granddaughter took their fish and ate them, and then they encountered something that you would never expect or believe---and---you will have to wait until I get to heaven to hear the rest of the story!"  At this point I was sobbing, but I got the words out---and Rebecca and Jake started laughing.  I will never forget the look pure joy on this young mom's face.
 
Rebecca's laughter has always been contagious and I too began to really laugh.  One other detail of importance is that all of us had been gingerly holding Molly, afraid that the stress of handling her might be more than her little body could handle.  Jake and I looked at the heart and oxygen monitor to see if our hearty laughter had stressed her system, but the opposite was happening-they were going up!   Her oxygen saturation which had been at 80 shot up to 92, then 94, 97, 98, 99---we just kept laughing and her oxygen level went to 100 per cent, which it hadn't been in 24 hours.  All four of us cheered with raised arms like at a football game.  It was a moment of sheer delight and mystery.  A small thing, perhaps?  Yes, no doubt.  But in the valley of the shadow of death, God gave us laughter.
 
Christians are the ONLY people who can laugh in the midst of such a crisis without despair-we KNOW where we are headed.  Heaven is certain because of what Jesus Christ did for us through His death for our sins.  Because He lives we who believe have the hope of life after death.   If a person places faith in Christ for forgiveness of his sins, surrenders his life to Him, then he can be certain of heaven too.  It's the ultimate reason why death is different for a true follower of Christ.  And it's why we could laugh as our beloved Molly was about to leave us.
 
Laughter stopped  and the tears flowed again as I was told it was time for me to say good bye.  Rebecca was now holding Molly. Barbara and  I knelt beside her as I read her my good bye letter:
 
 
Mighty Molly
 
I just met you-I feel cheated.
I don't want to say good bye.
 
I know I'll likely see you in a couple of decades or so-in light of eternity, it won't be long, really.
Still I don't want to say good bye.
 
You will always be My Molly, my granddaughter.
I'm really sad that I won't be getting to spoil you 
with a doll, 
or go sneak chocolate,
or take you on ice cream dates,
and eat chocolate pie and pudding.
Laughing all the time at what your mommy and daddy would say if they knew what we were doing.
I don't want to say good bye.
 
Your 7 days sure brought a lot of joy to your mom and dad's face-
I've watched them drink you in with their eyes, kiss you from head to foot, stroke and caress you.
Your parents loved you well-God couldn't have given you better parents.  Courageous parents.
They have loved you with a sacrificial love that only a very few little girls like you ever get to experience.
Because it hurts their hearts so much, 
Oh, how I really don't want to say good bye.
 
And so, Sweet Molly until that day in heaven
When we will celebrate the Greatness of our God together,
(then we will go sneak chocolate and go on an ice cream date)
I MUST say good bye.
 
Good bye Molly Ann.
 
I love you,
Papa                                                                                                                                                                                                       
Molly Ann Mutz
June 13, 2008-June 19, 2008
 
 
We cannot Lord, Thy purpose see
But all is well that's done by Thee.
 
Dennis 
Psalm 112:1-2

Praise the Lord!  Blessed is the man who fears the Lord, who greatly delights in his commandments!      2     His offspring will be mighty in the land; the generation of the upright will be blessed. The Holy Bible : English standard version. 2001 (Ps 112:1-2). Wheaton: Standard Bible Society. 
- Psalm 112: 1-2


Why we shared this story with you, our family!
 
Mainly because you are our family.  You've all been a part of our life---some more than others but still a part.  So, we wanted to bring you into some of the ministry that happens outside of our conferences, radio programs or equipping resources.  Real life is always the most powerful testimony to God's goodness.
 
The reality of this life is that none of us will escape hardship or, ultimately, death.  In fact, some of you are experiencing heart wrenching situations or maybe even death just like the Rainey and Mutz families.  As our friends and family and partners in this ministry with us, we thought we would let you inside the heart of the man God has selected to lead us at FamilyLife during this time.  And, more importantly, we want you to know that just as the Rainey's and Mutz' are experiencing pain they are also rejoicing with God. 
 
In a day when the world tries to equate faith with ease of life, the reality of hardship breaks forth.  True Christian faith does not mean we will go through this life without pain or trouble.  But, what you read as Dennis openly shares about how their family is handling this tragedy is that faith in God works despite the trial and trouble.  As Dennis says often, life is where faith makes up its mind.   
 
Maybe some of you who have read this story don't know of your ultimate destination.  If you were faced with news of your imminent death, you can't say with the certainty Dennis proclaimed of going to Heaven.  Well, the good news is that you can KNOW what your destiny will be.  Want to find out how?  Just reply to this email or give us a call and we'd love to talk to you about that.
 
We pray that you can experience that same hope through any darkness you are going through.  We are always here to pray with you and provide words of encouragement in the midst of life happening.  May you experience God's peace even (or especially) during difficult times.  And, if life is going well for you, remember to thank God for those times and be an encouragement to someone who needs to hear the hope you have in Christ!

Dennis Rainey asks for prayer for his new baby granddaughter-Molly

As a part of our family, by either blood or the Spirit of God, we want to share some family news with you. Our extended family through ministry, FamilyLife, is in a collective state of sorrow as we have walked along Dennis and Barbara Rainey's granddaughters fight for life over the last 6 days. She is (or maybe has already) ready to meet God after a fight for life. Dennis sent us an email this morning that outlines the past few days and what they have all gone through. He asked us to pas this along to anyone who would pray for Rebecca and Jake Mutz, Molly-the little baby who is dying and the rest of the Rainey and Mutz families. So, as our extended family we are asking you to spend a few minutes if you will to offer up prayers to our great God who is teh ony real comforter in times like these. Thank you for being a part of our family and, therefore, being there to share these kinds of prayer requests with you.

When Prayer is all there is, It is enough
A Story and Prayer Request from Dennis Rainey

As the sun is coming out here in Colorado, and The Son will soon be welcoming home Rebecca and Jakes daughter, Molly. A gift, entrusted to them for 7 days, to be ushered home, undoubtedly by a band of the gentlest and mighty angels dispatched from the throne of God to carry her into the presence of The Savior.

What has been tough, is about to get much tougher. Pray for Rebecca and Jake and forward this email to anyone you know who will pray for them.

Our days here have been so full of the presence of God. Honoring Him for Molly Ann.

Friday morning she was born; she didn't cry for nearly 4' because she was suffering from congestive heart failure. Her mom held her only for seconds before she was whisked away to be placed on life support. We think her problem is a heart murmur. Oh how I wish that was all she had. She is rushed by ambulance to The Children's Hospital here in Aurora. We arrive that evening to hear Jake say she is going to need brain surgery. I am thinking, I wish it was a heart murmur.

Saturday was a day of testing, in more ways than one. She has x-rays, ultra-sound, and MRIs around 11. The radiologist makes a copy for Jake and me from her text book about the Vein of Galen. I go on line and find out that Molly is up against a serious abnormality in the middle of her brain that it is VERY rare and VERY destructive. Around 4 we are seated in a private room with a neurologist, cardiologist, neonatologist, and nurse giving us the news that over 50% of Molly's brain is permanently damaged and that the damage affects both halves of the brain. 10-15-20 dangerous surgeries, she MIGHT be able to have A FEW functions as a human being. (Later I talk to a friend who has been a neurologist for 30 years and he puts it in perspective-"In cases like Molly where there is so much brain damage, I have never seen a good outcome through surgery." Never is a strong word. Yet we hope and pray for a miracle-even today) It is as though this young couple have been hit by a truck, news beyond comprehension. Joy turns to mourning.

In other words, it would take a miracle for Molly to live.

Sunday Jake's parents, Bill and Pam Mutz, arrive along with some of their family. Laura flies in from DC, Samuel and Stephanie and their three children fly in from Seattle, Ashley flies in from Memphis where she was on vacation with her husband and 5 sons and Ben and Marsha Kay come to the hospital. Rebecca and Jake want to introduce their new daughter to each family member. Many come and kneel at Rebecca's feet and just sob. When a family is being a family it is powerful. Worshipful. God honoring.

Jake and Rebecca spend a good bit of Sunday and Monday praying, talking, seeking second opinions trying to decide what is God's will for Molly; what is the loving thing to do?

Monday we surround Molly and have a baby dedication, read Scripture, pray and sing a couple of songs. More than a dozen of us weep our way through the familiar hymn:

Turn your eyes upon Jesus.
Look full in His wonderful face.
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim,
In the light of His glory and grace.

Again many of us kneel at Rebecca's feet as she hold's little Molly in her arms teethered to life support tubes.

Monday night Bill and Pam Mutz and Barbara and I witness the unimaginable-we sit in a hospital room as Jake hold's Molly, listening for over 2 hours as Jake and Rebecca process their choices. God is God, but it's impossible to NOT feel, this just shouldn't be. What a choice for a young couple to have to make. They decide to not pursue the several very dangerous and complex brain surgeries and remove life support later in the week.

Tuesday, honestly, I don't know what happened to Tuesday. But I do know that if love could heal, Molly would be well. Instead, we can all see Molly's little chest pounding, her heart beating faster and faster, trying to keep up with what she needs to live. 60-80% of her blood is going to her brain when it should be 10-15%.

I do know that Wednesday was an incredible day. Videoing, picture taking, making a mold of Molly's hands, Rebecca and Jake holding Molly still teethered by life support tubes. Rebecca and the mom's giving Molly her first, and only bath, washing her hair. Stroking her little naked body. This is not what this young mother expected. Doing footprints and hand prints. Ask me to show you my bible and I'll show you her footprints all over Psalm 127 and 128, and her handprint on my life verse, Psalm 112:1-2; Her life may have been short in terms of days, but her life has been mighty. Mighty Molly Mutz.

Wednesday closed out with this email at midnight from Jake, on the close of the last full day that Molly will likely live:

I just got done holding Molly chest-to-chest for the last 3.5 hours! Heavenly! I could feel her beating heart on my bare chest! 2569 kisses later I relinquished her to Mom.

She is an Angel!!!!

Now Rebecca is experiencing this delight! I just looked over at Bec & she nodded, as if to say - I WILL be sleeping here with my Sweet Pea for the next 12 hours!

We love you guys!
Jake & Rebecca
And now today. Molly's coronation day. Read Ecclesiastes 7:1-4. This morning we will all say goodby one by one and then leave Rebecca and Jake to spend the afternoon with her. She is expected to live only a few minutes after being taken off all life support machines later on this afternoon.

Pray for Jake and Rebecca today.
And for the Mutz family and ours.
Our hearts are breaking.

You are loved and appreciated,
Molly's Papa
Ps 112:1-2
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Jesus told his disciples and, therefore, those who follow as disciples today, "In this world you will have trouble. But, take heart for I have overcome the world." There is a day coming when the pain and sorrow will cease.

Just as Steve Curtis Chapman and his family dealt with the tragic accidental death of their little daughter, Maria and as the Rainey's and Mutz' face this storm of life, you might be facing something that is just as real in your life. The only hope we have in this world is that this isn't all there is. If it was, these situations would seem hopeless. And yet, our hope is in the world yet to come. Until that day when Jesus comes back, we will have trouble. If you want to know how you can have peace in the midst of storms in this life, click here.

Please pray for the Rainey and Mutz family. Not just today but over the next few days and weeks as God brings them to mind. They will need the power of a loving God to provide them comfort during times of sadness and sorrow, especially in the coming days and weeks. Thank you for being Christ "with skin on".